still a wanna be.

well... its been quite some time since my last post. back in january I registered for the PCT Ultra 50 miler. prior to my registration for that race, I was hit by a car on my way to work and had a hip injury that really derailed my training. well, i got orthotics that have really helped my biomechanics and has eliminated my hip pain. that is a plus. however, i just havent been able to get on track with my training. my motivation is in the toilet. thinking about july 25th and the pct ultra fills me with dread. currently, I am in absolutely, no uncertain terms, no way ready for this race and will not be ready by the time it rolls around. my fear is that I am going to show up, and end with a big fat DNF by my name. i'd honestly rather that not happen. but I know i cant finish the race. this past weekend jess and I were in Maui (awesome) and I decided not to run the race. when I made that decision, i was filled with a sense of peace and relief. I definitely want to do a 50 miler, and am looking at the october race. I feel like that gives me enough time to get my training back on track and get ready for it all. backing out of this race sucks, I know, but i think its the right decision for me right now.

seatbelts.